Posts Tagged ‘Virgo’
Minnie Pearl
The birthday girl for October 25 is Minnie Pearl.
I was sort of surprised to discover that Minnie Pearl is a Scorpio. I went through a few other “character” comedians in my head to see if could make a parallel between their characters and their zodiac signs. In a few cases, I could. Dame Edna, for instance, has that over-the-top glitz that I often associate with Aquarius. Pee-wee Herman wears Glen plaid which is something that I associate with Virgo. But nothing about Minnie Pearl reminds me of her Scorpio sun sign.
RuPaul, who can be considered to be a comedian with all the one-liners he delivers, is a Scorpio, too. Yet his costume makes me believe that he’s a Scorpio. I don’t even know where to start with Minnie Pearl!
Tila Tequila
The birthday girl for October 24 is Tila Tequila.
I once had the idea to write a book about the clichés that sun-sign astrologers like me spread around. It was going to be called “Virgos are Prudes, Scorpios are Sluts.” I wanted to call it that title because I actually believe that those signs endow natives with the opposite characteristics. For every “virgin” allusion I’ve ever read about the sign of Virgo, I know of an actual Virgo who behaves like a slut (for lack of a better word). And for every description I’ve read of Scorpio natives who are “passionate” lovers, I know one in real life who is as cold as ice.
That’s the problem with sun-sign astrology: it’s vague and too general. Unfortunately, if you want to make money as an astrologer, you have to put up with the conventions of the business, and that includes perpetuating the clichés. I try to cope with this dilemma by having fun with the stereotypes.
That brings me to Tila Tequila. As I just mentioned, I don’t believe that Scorpio natives normally fit the “slut” bill. So I looked up her chart and her moon is in Virgo. One of the jokes I’ve been telling for years is that Virgo natives really are prudes until they’ve got a drink or two in them. I suppose that a Virgo moon would endow an individual with a similar modus operandi. With Mars in Virgo, too, she strikes me as someone who would become quite emotionally desperate and needy when her guard is down.
Now I kind of wish that I had watched her show so I would have a better idea if I’m right about her.
Blackie Lawless
The birthday boy for September 4 is Blackie Lawless.
Hot on the heels of posting that Whitey Bulger has an appropriate name for a Virgo, I discover that Blackie Lawless is a Virgo, too! There goes that theory. Oh well! If it really worked, Goldie Hawn would be a Leo and Red Buttons would be an Aries . . .
Whitey Bulger
The birthday boy for September 3 is Whitey Bulger.
In my book I claim that white is the signature Virgo color. So it should be no surprise that Whitey Bulger is a Virgo, right? Right?
Shauna Sand
The birthday girl for September 2 is Shauna Sand.
The two things that I mention the most about Virgos is that A) they are blind to their own faults and B) they are prone to addiction and/or sleeping disorders because their minds just don’t shut down. I may be perpetuating sun-sign cliches, but if you knew the Virgos that I’ve known . . .
Anyway, Shauna Sand is sort of ridiculous looking. More than anything else, she’s known for dressing like a whore. I did read that she had appeared on “Celebrity Rehab” so I tried to find out why. Googling it really produced nothing for me. If someone who has watched the show and knows why she was in rehab and what she accomplished, I’d really like to know. Was she really addicted to something other than publicity? Drop me a line in the comments section.
Padma Lakshmi
The birthday girl for September 1 is Padma Lakshmi.
I’m a big fan of the so-bad-it’s-good film “Glitter,” starring Padma Lakshmi as “Sylk.” Like everyone else in the film, she gives a horrible performance. Strangely, it’s described as “comedic” on Wikipedia, as if someone in her inner circle has edited the page to confirm that Lakshmi was in on the joke. I don’t believe that she was.
Virgo is a cerebral sign. Perhaps it’s necessary for someone as smart as Lakshmi to rationalize a bad career move in this fashion rather than just admitting that she made a terrible mistake. Knowing the Virgos I’ve known, it wouldn’t surprise me if she did just that.
Caligula
The birthday boy for August 31 is Caligula.
While I respect most Virgos for having something in common with me — a sense of dignity — I have noticed that they are far more prone to debauchery than anyone else in the zodiac. I’m constantly repeating the same jokes about them: they are the biggest prudes until you get a drink or two into them, and then all bets are off.
I’ve never been bothered to look up Caligula’s sign before. I shouldn’t be surprised that he’s a Virgo. Wikipedia describes him as “a noble and moderate ruler during the first two years of his rule. After this, the sources focus upon his cruelty, extravagance, and sexual perversity . . .”.
Sounds like every drunken Virgo friend I’ve ever had.
Lisa Ling
The birthday girl for August 30 is Lisa Ling.
Of all the former stars of “The View,” I can imagine that Ling was the one who was the most annoyed by her fellow co-hosts. Being an orderly, self-disciplined Virgo, it must have been difficult to be constantly interrupted by everyone else on the panel. But at least Ling had a Capricorn moderating the festivites: Meredith Viera. It’s the Capricorn who tells the others to shut up and behave themselves when they get out of hand, like Julie Chen on “The Talk.”
Since the departure of Viera, there has been far less “moderation” on the show. I suspect that a Virgo like Lisa Ling would find the current cast entirely intolerable. It’s probably a good thing that she moved on when she did.
Lea Michele
Today’s birthday girl is Lea Michele.
Michele’s annoyingly-earnest character on “Glee” could be a Virgo. She’s a perfectionist. She’s neurotic. She sees something completely different from the rest of us when she looks in a mirror. Nevertheless, that character doesn’t even hold a candle to the actress’ red-carpet persona.
I always laugh my head off when Joan Rivers makes fun of Lea Michele on the “Fashion Police.” I don’t believe that Michele ever looks bad on the red carpet, but she overthinks everything from her hair and makeup to her wardrobe and her posing. The result is so contrived as to become comical — at least when Joan mocks it, it’s funny.
Michele needs to stop trying so hard to be perfect. Asking her to do that, though, is like asking the sun not to shine, or like asking Rachel on “Glee” to stop being so annoying. It probably isn’t going to happen.
Andrej Pejic
The birthday boy for August 28 is Andrej Pejic.
Each zodiac sign is either masculine or feminine. Within those definitions there are more-masculine signs and less-masculine signs, as well as more-feminine signs and less-feminine signs. The planets also have genders. Virgo is a feminine sign ruled by the hermaphroditic planet Mercury.
That doesn’t predispose a Virgo individual to feminine or hermaphroditic behavior. What can often happen with Virgos, though, is that their cosmic composition can lend them a rather sexless quality. Virgo is considered to be a “barren” sign: rather sexless in its nature.
I can think of hundreds of Virgos off the top of my head who are the opposite of sexless. Still, it’s not surprising to me that the most “genderless” model in the history of the fashion business is a Virgo. Andrej Pejic plays both sides of the fence beautfully, but to me he comes off as lacking sex appeal in either case.
I wonder if I’m the only one who feels this way? Perhaps there’s something in my stars that makes me feel this way rather than something in his. It’s something I need to think about.
Cosmically Chic 
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